We've all walked out of the movie theater, shaking our heads, stunned at the insane pile of crap we just sat through. On this blog we count the many ways Hollywood thinks you're a mouth-breathing moron, a hormonally-addled 12-year old boy, a right-wing whackjob, or a religious nutcase . . . and makes you pay for the privilege. Here, we talk back to the screen.

Quest for Fire: Burned By the Question

Okay, this is an old one, but stands as evidence of the length of time Hollywood has had it in for us believers.

A laughably poor premise in which a species (us) that has learned to survive in a hostile world still inexplicably cannot make fire. Must be those heavy brows. They already know how to communicate, hunt, nurture children, bind themselves into a cohesive group, fight, use tools, strategize battles and engage in deception against the enemy, make clothing and weapons . . . and yet they cannot make fire?

Think about the level of intelligence required just to survive and then try to convince yourself that making fire is not the most basic skill any human ever learned (if only to survive a dinner of raw meat.) It inarguably came long before speech, tools, clothing, and culture.

This is what happens whenever we consider first causes. Modern unbelievers say the universe began with the Big Bang, but have no answer whatsoever to the question of what caused the explosion. The same holds true in every case where they try to excise a Prime Mover from the equation: utter, laughable failure. Truly, what is more unbelievable: the Big Bang itself or the Big Bang Coming From Nowhere?

Surely, the creatures in this film are not my forebears but rather those of the filmmakers. Gotta give them credit, though: without films like these, Ron Perlman would never have had a career.

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